Walking After You
by Maenaren
Summary: UPDATED!!! - *Chapter 6 up* Draco has hurt his best friend, Gwen, and then she comes to Hogwarts and goes out with Harry to get back at him. I suck at summaries so it's much better than it sounds. Please R&R :D
1. Could I Push Rewind?

**Chapter One - ****Could I push rewind?**

_Thinking about what I've thrown away_

_Could I push rewind?_

_The credits traverse, signifying the end_

_But I missed the best part_

_Could we please go back to start?_

**_11:00am by Incubus_**

*

_He was running through the gardens at the Manor.  He was playing 'chasey' with a red-haired girl.  Every time he thought he had got her she would evade him yet again.  He was getting frustrated so he sat down in a huff.  Then he felt a small hand on his shoulder.  He looked up to see her violet eyes smiling mischievously at him…then she drew out what she had been hiding behind her back.  It was a pumpkin pie and she squashed it on his head, making him jump._

*

Draco woke with a start and looked out the window of the Hogwarts express allowing his mind to wander.  With every inch the wheels moved they took him further and further away from his summer holidays and…

Draco sighed and was grateful for the solitude of his train compartment.  He had chosen this one specifically, locked the door and pulled down the blind so he would hopefully not be bothered.

Like most of the students on the train Draco wished he could relive the last few weeks of the summer but his reason was not to put school off for even longer but so he could change something he should not have said…he had hurt someone he cared for and he wasn't sure if she would ever forgive him.

His parents had gone away for the summer and his childhood friend, Gwendolyn, was staying with him as she had done every summer of his life.

Gwendolyn's parents were old family friends of the Malfoys so they had grown up together.  Her father had an odd obsession with Muggle music that he had passed on to his daughter, which she in turn had subjected Draco to every summer.

He smiled as he remembered the way her violet eyes lit up when she would listen to it, and how every single time she would say, "We, in the wizarding world think Muggles are non-magic people.  But I just think they possess a different kind of magic than we do."

Draco let his mind drift to the night before Gwendolyn was to leave, when they were listening to her favourite Muggle band, Led Zeppelin, in his bedroom and a discussion had arisen about school and boyfriends/girlfriends.

    "Come on, Draco!  There has to be _someone you fancy at your school," Gwendolyn exclaimed, whilst changing the song._

Draco shook his head in response, "Nope.  Not one…anyway how about you, Gwen?"

Gwendolyn walked back to the bed and sat beside Draco who had propped himself up on one elbow.  "Nah, I don't really go for girls."

    "Bugger!  I wouldn't have minded seeing _that."  Draco grinned.  "You know what I mean though, cheeky."_

    "Yeah, I know.  In fact boys were my main problem last year…mum and dad reckon I was a 'naughty girl'."

    "A naughty girl?" Draco repeated, raising his eyebrows.

    "That's just their way of calling me a slut…" Gwendolyn lied down facing Draco and propped herself up on one elbow, like he had.

    "So were…I mean, did you…were you?" Draco tried to find the right words but they evaded him.

    "No! Well, I never _slept_ with any of them, anyway," Gwendolyn replied almost indignantly.

    "So, you've never slept with _anyone_ before?"  Draco wanted to be sure he had got the matter straight.

    "_No, I haven't.  Have you?"_

Gwendolyn's face was serious so Draco knew not to make a joke out of it and just shook his head in response.

"What do you think it's like?" Gwendolyn asked.  Draco was becoming a little uncomfortable with where the conversation was going, but responded to Gwendolyn's question anyway.  "I dunno…I 'spose it's just something you have to experience, you know."

If Gwendolyn was uncomfortable she certainly wasn't showing it.  Draco suddenly became very interested in his bed spread.  It was quite beautiful really; black with green dragon's embroidered painstakingly on it.

Gwendolyn reached over and lifted Draco's chin with her hand, so she could look into his eyes.  She moved herself closer to him so she could lean in to kiss him.  Draco wasn't surprised, he had kissed Gwendolyn before, and so he didn't find it strange when she pulled him even closer to herself.

Draco shifted in his train seat.  He didn't really want to think about the rest of that night, as much as it would have pleased him to do so, but he needed to think about the next day.

Draco had woken up before Gwendolyn; he got dressed and went to look out the window.  It was something he liked to do to clear his mind, sometimes.  He heard Gwendolyn stir and turned his attention back to the naked girl sleeping in his bed.  He wasn't sure if what had happened last night was a mistake or not but it certainly made him question his feelings about his best friend.

The problem was, whenever Draco's feelings were in question he generally had a hard time dealing with the situation.  He could deal with hate, contempt, smugness and many other not-so-desirable attributes…but when it came to something like love…well, that wasn't anything he had learnt growing up and was certainly not something a Malfoy openly displayed.

Draco was in the midst of contemplating his battling feelings when Gwendolyn woke up.

She sat up and covered herself with the sheet. "Hey you…how long have you been awake?"

    "Not long," Draco lied.

    "Last night…what does it mean?  I mean for you and me, that is," Gwendolyn asked, her voice groggy from sleep.

    "In what way?" Draco asked, knowing exactly what Gwendolyn meant, wanting to put off this moment.

    "You know.  I just thought that because of what happened…you know…things would be different between us."

    "I don't see how.  You got what you wanted!  You had your fun.  You found out what sex was like and that's it, right?" Draco could have hit himself right then but the hurt look on Gwendolyn's beautiful face made him feel even worse.

She tried to say something but she was utterly speechless and fought back the tears that threatened to spill over.

Draco looked away from her and hurriedly walked out of his room.

That was the last time they had spoken and that was three days ago.  She avoided him for the rest of the day and when Draco's and Gwendolyn's parents returned she told her mother and father she wasn't feeling well and asked if they could leave straight away.   

Draco sighed.  He really wished he could just go back and change everything.  He knew, of course, there were magical ways to 'push rewind but he wouldn't do that.  That would be immoral not to mention the consequences of changing the past.  He would just have to fix things himself.  He decided on sending Gwendolyn an owl when he got to school; it was easier for him to write things down.  He didn't realise then, of course, that sending her an owl wouldn't be necessary after all.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Hogwarts express or Draco but I do own Gwen.  She's totally mine.  I also don't own Incubus or the song they wrote but I think they're nifty anyway.


	2. And You Started Over

**Chapter Two - And You Started Over**

_You fell down of course_

_And then you got up of course_

_And you started over_

_Forgot my name of course_

_Then you started to remember_

**_The Same Boy You've Always Known _**

**_by_****_ The White Stripes_**

*

As was customary the year at Hogwarts began with the sorting of new students into one of the four houses: Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw or Slytherin.  After all the students had been sorted Dumbledore hushed everyone and said, "This year we have another new student at our school.  Her family moved here from France this year, and she has been attending Beauxbatons for the last six years.  She has already been sorted as she didn't want to do it with all the first years.  She was put into Gryffindor and I'm sure all the seventh year Gryffindors will make her feel most welcome.  Now, allow me to introduce you all to our new student, Gwendolyn Fleetwood."

Draco's head shot up at the name Dumbledore had just announced.  Surely he was mistaken but, no.  There was his Gwendolyn standing next to Dumbledore, wearing Hogwarts robes, in Gryffindor colours no less.  He tried to make eye contact with her but her eyes were fixed on something else.  He followed her gaze to see what had her so intrigued and was horrified to see _who she was looking at so intensely.  Harry Potter!_

Gwendolyn could feel Draco's gaze on her.  She didn't know exactly where he was but after knowing someone your whole life you get to know the feeling when they look at you.  She was trying to think of a way to, as she liked to say, "Piss him off royally."  Then her gaze fell upon a certain seventh year Gryffindor.  She knew instantly who he was.  How could she not?  Draco had complained and griped about him for the past six summers straight!  He had, of course, failed to mention just how good looking he was…and what would get underneath Draco's skin more than if she started to fancy Harry Potter?  She couldn't think of anything so she decided she was _definitely_ going to get to know Harry, hopefully more than a friend would.

Harry's breath caught in his throat when he saw the girl that was to become his class mate.  She was positively beautiful!  Her eyes were a bright blue-violet, her crimson hair hung in curls that framed her round face greatly contrasting the lily-white of her skin.  Her school uniform hugged her curvaceous body and attracted most of Harry's attention.  

Dumbledore had finished talking and Gwendolyn was allowed to take her seat at the Gryffindor table.  She walked straight to where Harry was seated and asked quietly, "Is it ok if I sit next to you?"

Harry nodded, lost for words and Gwendolyn could feel Draco's stare still fixed on her, only now, she was sure it had turned from luke-warm to deathly cold.

Draco didn't once look away from Gwendolyn for the whole feast.  He was so confused.  He was pissed off at Potter for talking to _his Gwendolyn, but more pissed off at himself for doing what he had done.  He was hurt that Gwendolyn refused to give him any kind of recognition but admitted that he deserved it.  Then there was the fact that she could go there, sit down and become instant friends with them but Potter had outright refused the friendship he had offered all those years ago.  Although, he did notice, Granger looked a little disgruntled about the new arrangement of the Gryffindor table.  But Pothead, Weasel and just about everyone else seemed to be doing everything they could to make Gwendolyn fit in.  _

And indeed they were; Gwendolyn had never felt so much at home in such a small amount of time.  For the first twenty minutes most of the girls were a little stand-offish, as they were obviously jealous of the boys' collective attention towards her but they warmed up to her soon enough.  Gwendolyn made a point, though of especially talking to Harry.  She knew how much he liked Quidditch, as Draco had told her, and that he was going to be captain of the team so she engaged him in a conversation about his favourite sport.  He was quite surprised at how much she knew about Quidditch but after listening to Draco go on about it she wasn't at all surprised at her knowledge.

Halfway through the dinner Harry spotted Professor Snape heading in the direction of the Gryffindor table and pointed this out to Ron and Hermione.  "Hey, look. Snape's coming over here."

    "What, is he going to take points off of Gryffindor for not eating our soup right?" Ron said, only half joking.

Harry had begun to tell Gwendolyn about Snape but she was standing up and walking - no running - towards him.

    "Uncle Severus!" She cried, gaining the attention of a lot of the staff and students.  Gwendolyn threw her arms about the Potions teacher's neck who was actually smiling!

Ron and Harry were rather dismayed at their new friend's display of affection towards their most loathed Potions Master and so they were relieved when, after chatting for a few minutes, he walked back to the Staff table.

    "Snape is your uncle?" Ron asked incredulously.  Harry nudged Ron and told him not to be so rude but Gwendolyn did not seem to mind.

    "He's not my uncle by blood.  He's just a really good friend of the family.  I suppose you don't like him though?" Gwendolyn looked at the faces of her fellow Gryffindors, and though she had only known them for about half an hour she could tell that they did not like her "Uncle Severus" at all.

    "Your family doesn't have any other friends of that nature that you'd like to warn us about now, do they?" Harry asked, cautiously.

    "Uh…well if by 'that nature' you mean people that not a whole heap of people seem to like then we tend to keep company of 'that nature' quite a lot.  Actually, one of my father's oldest and closest friends is…Lucius Malfoy." Gwendolyn bit her lip.  She knew that wouldn't go down well and she desperately wanted to be their friend.  Although Lucius Malfoy had, to everyone's surprise, renounced Voldemort and in a way helped to bring about his defeat, there were still not many who trusted Lucius.  In fact Lucius was still against Muggles and "Mudbloods" but was wise to not let these views into the open as much as he used to.

The Gryffindors gasped and Gwendolyn fiddled with her napkin nervously and continued, "But my father was never into anything bad.  He was a right bastard when he was at school mind you but when he married my mum he straightened himself out but Lucius still stayed friends with him even though they were in with er different crowds."

Harry believed Gwendolyn.  He didn't know why but she seemed a trustworthy person.  That and she was extremely 'hot'.

Gwendolyn had managed to keep Draco mostly off of her mind and by the time the Feast had ended she wasn't thinking about him at all.  She was laughing with Harry and his friends like she had known them for years and not just an hour or so.  But there was one of Harry's friends who she could tell certainly did not like her, or was at least wary of her: Hermione.  All the other girls had been extremely friendly to her and told her how much they loved her hair, especially Ginny Weasley (Gwendolyn was sure that they would be great friends) but Hermione had sat their sulking and unnoticed.  Gwendolyn liked all the other girls, and adored Ginny, but she really wanted to be friends with Hermione.  Draco had told her how much of a "know-it-all" she was, which just meant she was very intelligent and he didn't want to admit it, and Gwendolyn very much wanted someone who could match her intellectually, not just talk about fashion and boys.

Everyone began to make their way out of the Great Hall and Hermione rushed ahead of all the other Gryffindors.  This girl could in just one night gain more of that kind of attention than she had managed to in the past six years.  What did this Gwendolyn have that Hermione didn't?  Hermione laughed.  She knew what Gwendolyn had that she didn't a perfect, curvaceous figure, perfect bouncy hair, perfect white teeth, perfect violet eyes and perfect bloody skin!  Hermione heard someone call her name and immediately recognised Gwendolyn's voice, "Perfect voice," she reminded herself.  She thought of ignoring her but decided not to be rude and she turned around.

    "Hermione," Gwendolyn said, as she reached Hermione.  "I was wondering if we could walk together."

    "Ok," Hermione answered, clearly not enthused.

    "I mean, we didn't really get to talk much at dinner.  Mind if I see your timetable?  You can look at mine if you want."

Gwendolyn handed Hermione the piece of parchment that had her timetable on it and took the one Hermione had offered to her.

    "Hey, look.  We're in all the same classes!" Gwendolyn said, grinning.

Hermione mumbled something that sounded like "Yeah, great."

They reached Gryffindor Tower and Hermione showed Gwendolyn to the seventh year girls' dormitory.  Gwendolyn's bed was right next to Hermione's.

Gwendolyn opened her trunk and got out her textbooks, plus some others she thought were interesting.

Hermione noticed that one of them was _'Hogwarts: A History' and said, "Oh are you reading that?"_

    "Oh, I read it ages ago, even though I wasn't going to be coming here but I just like to keep it with me in case I've forgotten something.  Why?"

    "Oh, it's just that not many people here seem to have read it."  _'Maybe she isn't so bad after all,'_ Hermione thought.

    "Do you want to go over our textbooks together?  I've already read most of them but I always say you can't read a textbook enough," Gwendolyn motioned for Hermione to sit next to her on the bed.

    "You know I think I was wrong about you, Gwendolyn," Hermione said sitting down.

    "Call me Gwen…and how so?" Gwendolyn reached for her History of Magic textbook.

    "I thought you'd be like all the other girls, Gwen; only interested in boys and fashion.  I didn't expect you to be so much like…me."

Gwen smiled.  "Hermione, I think we're going to be great friends."

Hermione and Gwen spent the rest of the night reading over their textbooks, sometimes laughing, sometimes pointing out interesting facts to each other and only went to bed when the other Gryffindor girls told them to go to sleep.

When Gwen had turned out the light and got beneath her covers she smiled.  She had made great new friends in the Gryffindors, four in particular: Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny _and _she had completely forgotten how much she had been hurt by Draco.  Then, she started to remember.

Disclaimer: There's a lot more things in this chapter that I don't own and that's everything that belongs to JK Rowling.  But Gwen still belongs to me.  Oh, and I'm sure there are loads of Fleetwoods, but I got her name from the band Fleetwood Mac.  Again, The White Stripes belong to themselves as does their song.  The idea of Snape knowing Gwen belongs to my friend Lysha but I thought of her calling him 'Uncle Severus'.


	3. It Only Hurts When I Breathe

**Chapter Three - It Only Hurts When I Breathe**

****

_I played the fool today  
And I can see us vanishing into the crowd  
Longing for home again but home  
Is a feeling I buried in you  
I'm alright, I'm alright  
It only hurts when I breathe_

**_Breathe by Greenwheel_****__**

*

After a couple of weeks, Gwendolyn and Harry had started dating, much to the dismay of at least two of their fellow students: Draco and Hermione.  Hermione accepted that if they made each other happy she would just have to grin and bear it.  Draco on the other hand was furious and miserable all at the same time; his anger at Harry was only surpassed by his anger at himself.  Each time he saw Harry and Gwendolyn together he felt like a knife was being run through his heart.  _'But that is impossible,'_ he thought bitterly. _'My heart has already been shattered into a thousand pieces.  No knife could pierce the broken shards of my heart...I'm ok, though.  It only hurts when I breathe.'_

Draco's fellow Slytherins didn't understand his continuous melancholy state nor did they really care.  

Draco hadn't been able to talk to Gwen, and he got the distinct and spot on impression that she was avoiding him.  _'And I don't blame her either,'_ Draco thought miserably.

One Saturday, Draco noticed Gwen had pried herself away from Harry and was sitting alone under a tree, reading.  This, of course was a perfect opportunity for him to talk to her, so he walked hurriedly over to her.

    "Hello," Draco said softly.

Gwen looked over the top of her large book to stare coldly at Draco.  "What do you want?"

    "Is that any way to greet an old friend?" Draco laughed nervously.

    "I suppose not, but other people I know seem to have said worse things to old friends, so I think I should be excused." Gwen kept any emotion she was feeling out of her voice.  She would not let Draco think she was still pining away after him.  She wanted him to think she was happy with Harry.

    "Why didn't you tell me you were coming to Hogwarts this year?" 

    "I wanted to surprise you," Gwen said, pretending to still read her book.

    "Surprise me?  Well, I'll admit it was a bit of a shock when I heard Dumbledore say your name, I thought I had heard him wrong.  And then hearing you were in Gryffindor, well I always knew you were braver than I am so it wasn't _too much of a 'surprise'.  But what surprised me, and I mean __really surprised me is I hear that my best…and _only_ friend is going out with my worst fucking enemy!!!" Draco's voice was rather loud at this time and he had attracted attention from a few other students.  "All those summers when I would tell you about him and you would sit there listening to me, sympathising with me…" Draco lowered his voice and continued unsurely, "Loving me."_

Gwen stood up and poked Draco in the chest.  "Listen here!  Don't you play the victim!  You _always do that!  You do something wrong and you blame it on someone else.  Well, you are __not going to shift the blame onto me!  I like Harry.  He's nice, he's sensitive, and he's funny.  He's not a spoilt little upstart who hurts people without a second thought.  Maybe you should think about _that_ Mr Perfect Slytherin Pureblood!  And don't wear your hair like that you look just like your father!"  Gwen shoved Draco out of her way and ran back to the castle, clutching her book against her chest._

_'I'm such a dumb twat,' Draco thought as he watched Gwen run off.  He slid down the tree and sat on the ground with his head in his hands.  He was definitely going to have to work on his tactics if he was ever going to get Gwen back…if she ever wanted to speak to him again.  Draco watched Gwen slowly getting smaller and then she ran into someone: Potter.  He caught her around the shoulders and she said something to him that made him glare in Draco's general direction.  He pulled Gwen close to him and held her tightly.  Seeing that made Draco want to curl up to die.  He felt like nothing without Gwen; he had never realised just how much he loved her.  He had just thought they were friends, best friends, like Potter, Weasley and Granger.  But it was much more than that - his love for her had changed from wanting to play children's games to wanting to spend the rest of his life with her.  But he knew that would never happen now, he had pushed her away and he would never love anyone like that again._

Gwen wasn't watching where she was going and if she had she wouldn't be able to see - her vision was blurred with the tears she had fiercely fought back during her 'talk' with Draco.  Then she ran into something rather hard and looked up into the emerald green of Harry's eyes.

    "Harry, I'm sorry.  I didn't see you there," Gwen tried to sound happy.

    "Gwen, what's wrong?" Harry looked truly concerned for her.

Gwen tried to think of something to say but Harry had already spotted Draco sitting where he had seen Gwen earlier.  "Was it that prat, Malfoy?"

    "Uh…er…he had some news for me.  Um, his cat died and I was really quite fond of her.  I was just upset about that," Gwen knew that Harry didn't believe her but he didn't say anything. 

Harry pulled Gwen close to himself and held her tightly.  It was nice being in Harry's arms but Gwen always found herself comparing him to Draco.  Harry was strong, stable and sweet but Draco could be all those things when it was just him and Gwen.  Gwen didn't love Harry the way she loved Draco, but she knew Harry wasn't in love with her either, he just thought he was.  She was sure Draco loved her; why else would he seem so hurt.  _'But then why didn't he want you then?  He only wants you because Harry has you…'  Gwen pushed that nasty voice out of her mind and put all her attention on Harry - nice sweet, sensitive, stable Harry._

Draco spent the next few days thoroughly depressed; nothing could bring him out of his pit of despair.  He tried desperately to be his usual obnoxious and loathing self, but _nothing_ seemed the same when Gwen wasn't talking to him.

Draco sighed as he looked out the window of his dormitory one night.  It had been one whole week since he had last talked to Gwen and he definitely hadn't made any progress with talking to her.  He wondered if Gwen would miss him if he were to die, he supposed she would get over it soon enough.  He pondered this for a while, that thought leading to what it would feel like to die.  This greatly fascinated him.  He toyed with the idea of suicide, but not really sure if he was seriously contemplating it or not.  He tried to think of ten people that would miss him greatly but got stuck at one: his mother.  He was sure that Gwen wouldn't, he didn't think his father would, his fellow Slytherins certainly wouldn't, none of the teachers would and no other student in Hogwarts actually liked him.  This depressed Draco even further and his mind went back to his argument with Gwen, the week before.  

_'I don't really look just like my father with my hair like this, do I?' Draco thought.  Just to prove it to himself he went and stood in front of the mirror.  He gasped at his reflection.  He __did look just like a younger version of Lucius!  Draco couldn't handle the thought of ever being just like his father.  __'Father's cruel and cold and unloving and…just like me.'  _

Realisation hit Draco like a cold bucket of water and he threw himself onto his bed in a fit of despair.  Draco had always told himself he would _never be like Lucius, and here he was, a near perfect replica of his father.  _

_'When did this happen to me?' _

Draco fought back the annoying tears that pricked his silver eyes but lost the battle.  He buried his face in his pillow and wished more than anything that he wouldn't wake up in the morning, or indeed ever again.  The world wouldn't miss him…it still had his father.  Eventually he fell into a restless sleep, his dreams haunted with visions of Gwen; she was older and married to Harry then Draco saw himself.  He was alone, in the manor, _his_ manor.  It looked like loneliness had taken its toll on his sanity.  Draco fought to wake himself from the dream and he sat straight up in bed, still in the clothes he had been wearing all day.  

He sighed and lied back down on the crumpled sheets; tomorrow was another day, and he was positive that things could and probably would get worse.

Disclaimer: You know the drill.  Practically nothing's mine, except for Gwen.  And Draco's 'dead' cat.


	4. Volcano Girls

**Chapter Four - Volcano Girls**

*

A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Shannon, who wanted a chapter about Hermione and Gwen. :P Here you are, snookums!

*

_Volcano Girls,   
We really can't be beat.  
Warm us up and watch us blow.  
But now and then we fail   
And we admit defeat_

**_Volcano Girls by Veruca Salt_****__**

*

Gwen continued her life at Hogwarts, oblivious to the immense emotional pain Draco was in every time he saw her whether she was with Harry or Hermione or Ron or Ginny or one of the other many friends she had seemingly replaced him with.  Gwen was blissfully ignorant of Draco's pain and had made a great friend in Hermione, who she was spending more time with than Harry.  This was due to the fact that Harry was Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team and had practice and Hermione was the best study partner she had ever had.  They were both grateful to have someone that could match them in study skills and not just copy off of them.

One morning in the girls' dorm, Hermione took Gwen aside and said, "Gwen, did you know that you snore?"

Gwen looked confused for a minute and then she realised what Hermione was talking about.  "Herm, that's not me!"

    "Well, it's not any of the other girls!"  Hermione said, almost exasperated. 

    "Of course not, it's Draco!"  Gwen smiled at Hermione's confused expression.

    "Draco?" Hermione repeated, incredulously.

Gwen went over to her bed, pulled aside the curtains and rifled around under her covers for what she was looking for.  She came back over to Hermione and produced a cute, but rather disgruntled looking toy dragon.  If it had not been moving, Hermione would have mistaken it for an ordinary Muggle soft toy.

    "_This is Draco, Hermione.  Not a very original name, I know, but it suits him."_

The dragon puffed out his chest and snorted, obviously trying to breathe fire, but as he was full of stuffing all that happened was he managed to look awfully cute.

    "He is so gorgeous!  Is he named after…?" Hermione trailed off when she saw the look on Gwen's face.  Hermione had not been able to figure out the relationship between her new best friend and Draco Malfoy.  It was quite obvious Gwen had been avoiding him but Hermione thought that they would have been friends, as her father was very close to Lucius Malfoy.  

"Uh, Herm, why don't we take a walk by the lake?  It's a nice day for it," Gwen said nervously, looking outside.  She did not want to be questioned about her relationship with Draco.  

Hermione looked out the window; the sky was overcast but there were still quite a few students wandering about outside.  The orange leaves had nearly all fallen from the trees and were lying dormant on the ground, just waiting for someone to crunch through them in their Wellingtons.  It was a perfect October afternoon and there were only two weeks until Halloween.  This year, the Seventh Year students were having a Halloween Masquerade Ball as well as the Yule Ball at the end of year and Hermione could see quite a few clusters of girls outside, chatting excitedly, most likely about their costumes.  She nodded her agreement for a walk by the lake and followed Gwen outside.

They found a bench by the lake and sat down; Gwen was looking into the lake and Hermione was watching her.  Hermione was trying to decide whether or not to ask Gwen about Draco when Gwen said something she didn't hear properly. 

    "What was that, Gwen?" Hermione asked.

Gwen sighed and repeated herself.  "I said I suppose you're wondering why I'm always avoiding Draco and I change the subject when anyone tries to ask me if we're friends because of our parents."

Hermione bit her lip, "Yes, actually.  I was going to ask you about it but I thought I'd let you bring it up."

    "Well, we're friends, _best_ friends.  Like you and Ron and Harry are."  Gwen thought she'd leave out the fact that she was in love with him, feeling it wouldn't have the best impression on Hermione, considering she was dating Harry.

    "Best friends?  With Malfoy?" Hermione could not believe her ears.

    "He's different when he's at school, honestly.  At school he's a perfect replica of Lucius, and well, when he's out _with Lucius he's more subdued.  His father has control over him.  But when he's at home and it's just us or we're there with his mother then he's a completely different person.  He's not a saint or anything, he still has a few snide remarks to make and can be quite the snob but…" Gwen searched for the right words to convey exactly what she meant to Hermione.  "But I'm not sure we're still friends anymore."  Gwen looked near tears._

    "Why? What happened?"  Hermione was really worried about Gwen.  She may have only known her for just over a month but they were already very close; Gwen had managed to become part of Harry, Ron and Hermione's close-knit group.

Gwen was about to tell Hermione everything but something inside stopped her.  If Hermione knew what happened between Gwen and Draco she would think that she was using Harry, which when it came down to it, she was.  

    "We just had a disagreement that's all.  Well a pretty bad disagreement but these things happen all the time between friends."  Gwen's voiced cracked and she burst into tears.

Hermione put her arm around her new friend to console her.  "Shh, it's alright.  You're a girl, and we don't let things get us down for too long, right?  We're stronger and smarter than boys and we can't be beat.  Besides if you and Draco really are such great friends everything will work out fine, eventually.  You probably just both need some time to cool down and sort things out in your heads."

Gwen looked up at Hermione, her vision blurred from the tears.  Her mascara had run leaving black streaks down her cheeks so she rubbed the stains off of them.  "Thanks, Herm," Gwen sniffed.  "It's really good to have a girlfriend I can talk to." 

Hermione grinned.  "I know just what you mean."  Although, Hermione could not talk to Gwen about everything that was on her mind.  Like how she thought she was in love with Harry.  How could you tell your best friend you were in love with their boyfriend and had been since before you knew her?  Hermione sighed and took Gwen's hand pulling her up.

Hermione and Gwen walked back to the castle arm in arm both weighed down with their thoughts but taking comfort in each other's company.  When the two girls got back to the common room, Harry and Ron were waiting there.

    "Where have you two been?" Ron asked as he stuffed a chocolate frog into his mouth.

    "Just talking," Gwen said, walking over to sit on the arm of Harry's chair.  She ruffled his hair and kissed his cheek.

    "Oh, yeah…what about then?" Ron asked his mouth now full of chocolate.

Hermione and Gwen laughed at him and Hermione said, "Just girl stuff."

Hermione and Gwen looked at each other and smiled; it felt good to have a girlfriend.

Disclaimer:  I still own Gwen.  I also own a lot of other things but that's it for this story.  Except for maybe the plot. 


	5. Sleep

**Chapter Five - Sleep**

_Well, I could sleep forever_

_But it's of her I dream_

_If I could sleep forever_

_I could forget about everything_

**_Sleep by The Dandy Warhols_**

Gwen had been having a recurring dream since the day at the lake with Hermione up until the Halloween Masquerade Ball.  For a few mornings when she woke up she could not recall the details of the dream.  But one night, as Gwen tossed and turned in fitful slumber, the dream was more vivid than ever.  It wasn't so much a dream as a memory that was slightly warped.

_She could see her pale haired friend standing on a wall in his garden about four feet from the ground.  It looked as though he was going to jump; whether or not he was the crimson haired eight year old couldn't be sure.  She was some three or four yards away from him and she began to walk towards him slowly.  _

Gwen stirred in her sleep but did not wake up.

_The boy did not hear his friend walking behind him for he was deep in thought.  Though he was only eight there was still a lot that plagued his little mind.  Gwen stopped when she was only three feet from Draco, merely watching her friend.  He looked so far away, like he was in another world.  Gwen was a carefree child and could not understand the moods Draco sometimes got into, but she always managed to put a smile on his face.  She could tell that faraway look was in his eyes now and decided she would call out to him._

_    "Draco!" Gwen called out in her most cheerful voice._

_Draco turned to see Gwen, who had startled him from his thoughts when she had called his name.  But he had turned too quickly and lost his footing.  He tried to regain his balance by flailing his arms about but it didn't work and the next minute he was gone from view._

_Gwen hadn't expected she would startle him so much that he would fall and was momentarily in shock.  It only took her a few seconds to gather her wits and she ran over to the garden wall and knelt to look over.  Though he had only fallen four feet, it was enough to hurt him badly.  Gwen was so horrified at the sight before her eyes!  Draco looked so broken…_

_    "Help! Somebody, help!"  Gwen called out and soon Draco's parents, who had been having lunch in the Gazebo, came running._

_Gwen was still kneeling, but now quietly sobbing.  It was all her fault Draco was hurt.  Narcissa was comforting her and Lucius had gone down to where Draco was lying._

Gwen woke with a start, covered in sweat.  She remembered the day from her dream vividly.  It still made her uncomfortable to call to mind the vision of Draco lying so helpless and broken on the garden floor.  She still blamed herself.  Of course, Draco had been alright, nothing a Medi-Wizard couldn't fix, but she shuddered to think what would have happened if he had been standing on a taller wall.

Away, in the Slytherin Dungeon, Draco was also dreaming of his childhood friend.  

_It was the night of the Halloween Masquerade Ball and Draco scanned the occupants of the Great Hall for his friend, and the holder of his heart, Gwendolyn.  His heart flipped in his chest when he saw her.  She was breathtaking.  Even beneath her mask there was no doubt in his mind who he was looking at.  She was wearing Dress Robes of black, silver and deep forest green.  Her crimson hair was hanging loose in brilliant red ringlets.  Her mask was also green and only covered her eyes, coming to points at the top corners.  Draco pushed his way through the crowd and tried to get to Gwen.  He knew he was moving but he wasn't getting any closer, or maybe Gwen just kept getting further away from him.  He couldn't tell.  He tried to call out to her but he couldn't find his voice, all that came out was a squeak.  He tried again, with more effort, and managed to shout out to her._

_    "Gwen! Wait!"  She didn't seem to hear him.  She just walked away from him and in the direction of another young wizard, also dressed for the masquerade ball: Potter!_

_Draco now fought frantically to reach Gwen but everyone seemed to be pushing him back.  He looked up at the faces of the students and each one's face was concealed by a hideous mask.  Draco's breath was now coming in short gasps but he still fought to get to Gwen.  There was something he needed to tell her only he wasn't sure what it was anymore.  Did he have to apologise?  Well, that was part of it, but there was something inside of him, a deep seated feeling that was struggling to come to the surface just as Draco was struggling to get to Gwen._

_The room began to spin out of focus and Draco found himself sitting alone in a cold, dark room with his father and a young boy.  When Draco looked more closely at the two people he realised it wasn't his father, it was him in the future, and the young boy was him as a lad.  Both were beckoning him to follow them, the man promising wealth and glory and never ever to feel pain.  The young boy could not promise there would be no pain if he followed him but that he would have happiness._

_Draco looked at the two figures in front of him.  The man looked ruthless and cold, but not happy whereas the pale haired boy was full of life and joy.  Draco couldn't remember feeling the way the young boy looked any other time then when he was with Gwen but thinking of Gwen now caused pain.  He considered both options a minute longer and followed the man.  He was led through an open door that opened into black.  Draco felt suffocated by the black surrounding him, and somewhere he could here the cold, sinister laugh of the man who had led him there._

Draco fought to wake himself from his dream and sat upright in bed.  He knew he must try to apologise to Gwen again, the sooner the better.

Disclaimer: You know the drill.  JK Rowling owns all the characters except for Gwen.


	6. I'm Happy Wondering

**Chapter Six - I'm Happy Wondering**

****

_If you don't wanna say anything at all_

_I'm happy wondering_

**_Wondering by Good _****_Charlotte_****__**

****

**_*_******

When Draco awoke the morning after his dream he knew exactly what he was going to do today.  That night was the Halloween Ball and would have been a perfect time to apologise to Gwen but something told him he had already waited too long so he decided it would have to be at lunch.  He lied in bed thinking what he would say to her and how he would get her alone.  Then the perfect idea struck him and he jumped out of bed, eager to get dressed and get the morning out of the way.  He decided to skip breakfast so he could organise a few things before class.

Gwen looked scanned the Great Hall for any sign of her estranged best friend.  _"Why do you care where he is anyway, Gwen?  You're over him, remember?"_  The strong, determined part of Gwen was always reminding her of this.  _"Of course I remember," the less determined half replied somewhat indignantly.  Gwen realised that while she was having a mental disagreement with herself her friends had been talking to her.  She nodded and smiled but seeing the aghast looks on their faces knew she should not have agreed._

"Gwen, are you alright?  You just agreed that Snape would look good in women's underwear," Harry said as Ron shuddered and nearly gagged on his marmalade toast.

"Sorry, I wasn't listening…women's _underwear?_  That's a little…disturbing.  I really don't want to know about your sordid fantasies, especially when they involve Uncle Severus," Gwen said, grinning.

"I was trying to get your attention."  Harry was blushing and all the Gryffindors were teasing him.

"You're so cute when you get all embarrassed," Gwen said ruffling his hair.  She got up from the table, planted a kiss on the top of Harry's head and said, "I'll see you in class.  I've got to get something."

Hermione watched Harry's gaze follow Gwen out of the Great Hall and let out a silent sigh.  

When Gwen reached the bottom of the stairs she realised she had no idea where she was going; she didn't really need to get something.  In fact the only reason she had left the hall was because she had not seen Draco and wanted to find him, yet she had no idea why she needed to see him.  Gwen decided she would make her way to class and get there early.  As she was walking she thought back over the past few months of her life.  She cringed when she thought again of how she was using Harry, making him believe she had more than 'friend' feelings towards him.  Especially when she thought of the way Hermione looked at Harry when he wasn't looking.  She had no idea when she had become the sort of person that used people to get back at others.  She sighed as she let herself into the empty classroom.

In the shadows, Draco had been watching Gwen as she walked to class and continued to watch her through the window in the classroom.  He watched her as she got the books she needed from her bag and placed them on her desk, making sure they were all in line.  He watched as she put on the glasses she wore specifically for reading.  He watched as she became engrossed by what she was reading, biting the side of her lip as she always did when in deep concentration.  He watched as all the students filed into the classroom…and he watched as she smiled at a boy who was not him.

The lessons after lunch were cancelled so the students could get ready for the Masquerade Ball but all students had to attend lunch in the Great Hall for any notices that needed to be given to them.  

Draco's day was a blur right up until lunch.  His stomach felt like it was being twisted into knots, his heart was hammering against his chest, his arms and legs were tingling and his hands were clammy.  Draco Malfoy was nervous.

Everyone was eager to get lunch over and done with so they could get ready for the Masquerade Ball and Gwen was no exception.  She sat there, talking animatedly with her friends, all the while an odd feeling tugging at her stomach like something important was about to happen.  She noticed that the students had become a little quieter but thought nothing of it.  That is until she heard a familiar voice above the now quietened buzz of the Great Hall.  It was the voice that had filled the silences of every summer she had ever known.  The voice that had helped her through problems, had teased her when they were little…the voice that had hurt her.  And now it was singing one of her favourite Muggle songs.  She didn't want to turn around but she knew she had to.  She turned around so she was facing the complete opposite direction and saw Draco, standing on the Slytherin table, belting out her favourite tune.

                          "Tonight I'm tangled in my blanket of clouds

                          Dreaming aloud

                          Things just won't do without you, matter of fact

                          I'm on your back, I'm on your back, I'm on your back"

The dumbfounded silence that had filled the Hall was now replaced with excited chatter as Draco began making his way across the Great Hall, walking over each houses table, singing all the while.

                          "If you'd accept surrender, give up some more

                          Weren't you adored?

                          I can't be without you, matter of fact

                          I'm on your back"

Gwen could not believe her eyes or her ears.  She knew Draco better than he did himself and still she would never in a million years have thought him capable of something so…romantic.  _"Why can't he let me stay angry at him?" _ Gwen was frustrated with Draco and with herself.  The demure voice in her head was saying _"Forgive him Gwen, he's gone to so much trouble, and he'll get in a lot more trouble when the teachers get to him."  _Gwen knew that was true but the strong, stubborn voice kept yelling over the little voice, saying, _"Don't let him get off so easily.  Let him stew awhile."_

                   "If you walk out on me, I'm walking after you__

                   If you walk out on me, I'm walking after you"

Draco had nearly made it to the Gryffindor table, his eyes never leaving Gwen.  He could barely hear himself, or anyone else, above the thumping of his heart.  He knew he was making a complete fool of himself but if it meant he would have Gwen as his own then he didn't care if he was crowned Hogwart's Biggest Idiot.

                          "Another heart is cracked in two, I'm on your back"

Harry followed Draco's gaze right to Gwen.  He felt the anger rising but fought to keep it down, knowing Draco wasn't worth getting in trouble for.  _"But isn't Gwen?" _ The little voice inside of him reasoned.  He looked over at his girlfriend, her eyes glistening.  He could tell she was fighting back tears.  He looked around at everyone else and they seemed just as confused as he was.  He had no idea was Draco Malfoy was singing a love song at _his_ girlfriend, but after he was finished he intended on finding out.

                          "I cannot be without you, matter of fact

                          I'm on your back, I'm on your back, I'm on your back"

Hermione was not quite as shocked as everyone else.  She had always thought there was more to Gwen and Draco's relationship than her new friend had let on.  She was shocked though by Draco's ability to sing and inwardly wished someone would do that for her.  Her eyes drifted over to that someone and her stomach flip-flopped.  His tousled, raven black hair standing out sharply against his pale skin.  His green eyes, like two emeralds, peering out through round glasses.  He looked positively livid at the scene before him, but Hermione also noted the confusion on his face, making him look like a lost puppy.  His gaze flicked over to her and she quickly looked away, feeling her cheeks burning.  She hoped he would still be looking at her, realising it didn't matter Draco was singing to his girlfriend because the one he really cared for was sitting across from him.  But when Hermione looked up he was looking back at Gwen.

                          "If you walk out on me, I'm walking after you

                          If you walk out on me, I'm walking after you

                          If you walk out on me, I'm walking after you"

Draco finished the song just as he reached the Gryffindor table, standing right before Gwen.  He knelt down in front of her and took his hands in his own. 

    "I'm sorry. Can we please go back to how we were?" he pleaded, his voice lowered to a whisper.

Gwen considered him for a moment.  He looked so helpless that she almost broke down and through her arms around him, but the stubbornness wouldn't subside and she stood up throwing his hands back at him.   Draco stood up so he could be eye to eye with Gwen.

    "I don't see how.  You got what you wanted!  You had your fun.  You found out what making an idiot out of yourself in front of everyone was like and that's it, right?" Gwendolyn pushed Draco away and stormed out of the hall.

Everyone that had been watching quickly turned their gazes back to their lunches, feeling it would be appropriate.  Draco stood for a moment, lost for words before running out of the hall.  He didn't follow Gwen, instead he went down to the Slytherin dungeon.

Harry got up to follow Gwen but Hermione stopped him.  "I think it would be better for me to go.  I think Gwen needs another girl to talk to right now."

Harry silently nodded his agreement and Hermione withdrew from the hall before anyone could stop her.

Harry sat wondering.  He had known that Gwen and Draco were friends and had gathered from what little he knew about the situation that they had had a disagreement.  But surely Draco wouldn't go to the embarrassing length of singing a Muggle song in front of the entire song just because he had had a fight with a _friend.  Harry decided that there must be more than just friendship to Draco and Gwen's relationship.  This thought dampened his mood even further and he sat in his seat silently and grumpily for the rest of lunch._

Gwen was sobbing into her pillow and wondering.  Wondering why she hadn't just accepted Draco's apology.  Wondering if Draco loved her enough to still want to be with her.  Wondering if she and Draco _really_ were meant for each other.  Wondering what Hermione would think of her, what Ron would think of her…what _Harry would think of her._

Down in the Slytherin common room Draco was also wondering.  He was wondering why he had thought singing Gwen's favourite song would make things better.  Wondering why he had ever thought Gwen could forgive him.  Wondering why he had thought she still loved him.  Wondering why he was such an idiot.

Hermione climbed up the same stairs Gwen had climbed minutes before her, wondering.  Wondering just what the extent of Draco and Gwen's relationship was.  Wondering if her new best friend was doing ok.  Wondering why she didn't have someone that would sing her favourite song in front of the whole school at the risk of embarrassing himself and ruining his reputation all for her.  Wondering why she felt so lonely when she had so many friends.

Disclaimer: I do not own most of this.  If I did I would not be sitting around writing fanfic, believe you me.  Anyhoo the song Draco sings to Gwen is the beautiful title track for this fic 'Walking After You' by Foo Fighters.  Download it and love it *kisses*


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